June 26, 2009

Vaniloquence, noun
Vain or foolish talk

"Please, tell me, yet a-bloody-gain, about your connection with the late, great, if somewhat slightly jaded, scarred, and tainted, Michael Jackson?" asked Nipper, after having been precisely asked by Zeds to do so.

"Thank for you asking," replied Zeds, "as it's not something I usually like to mention. Not very often, anyway."

"Pint, please," said Nipper, to the barman, turning off his non-buzzard ears to something he'd heard a million times before.

"I'm still a little chuffed that back in 1995, when Nicky Campbell had the afternoon slot on Radio One, he dedicated his daily Teasingly Topical Teatime Triple Tracker to a newspaper story that day about a reporter who'd had something of a scoop, and that one of the songs the listeners chose was Jackson's Man In The Mirror."

"Is that it?" asked the barman.

"Oh yes," said Zeds.

"You're barred," said the bar, er, man.