September 10, 2008

A MULTI-billion dollar experiment to see if electricity can go "on" or "off" and create "light" in the process has worked.

Scientists this morning used precision instruments known in physics fields as "fingers" to manoeuvre a unique mechanism colloquially called a "switch" installed in a large underground cave deep beneath the Alps.

"It's true," gasped Professor Gustav Seenyoucoming. "We can now prove beyond reasonable doubt that electricity does work. The light goes on. The light goes off.

"And what's more," he added, "the light actually moves at the speed of light. Eureka!"

A spokesman for Thomas Edison said he was unavailable for comment because he was dead.